For years, and I mean almost my whole life, I’ve struggled with weight and body image issues. I try to think back to the earliest point that I can remember and it felt like being conscious about my height and my size consumed my life. I look at pictures from then and think , I think, “Was I crazy?” Fact is, it was a true issue for me.
From high school thru college, I always ranged between 135 and 150 pounds. Thru my twenties and thirties, I stayed between the 155-170 range. I am 5’8″ and I look at those numbers now and think why was I so hard on myself? I worked out every day. I trained clients in the gym so most days, I would get 2-3 work outs in. Who knows.
The first “weight” memory or one I can remember vividly was when I was at the University of Maine. I did everything I could to make to make the UMAINE cheeleading team and although I made it, the first thing one of those coaches said to me was I was “too big” to fly and that I need to watch my weight. I was crushed and remember focusing on that comment for years.
Once I moved to Florida in 2002, the very first thing an ex boyfriend had me look into was getting breast implants. Once again, another real positive figure in my life repeatedly letting me know, something was wrong with my body. Because we worked out together, so much, I had lost a ton of fat and put on a ton of muscle. That certainly didn’t have a positive affect on my twins and looking at pictures, I could certainly see how a pair of implants would have enhanced them but if I knew then, what I know now, I never would have considered it. What a night mare.
OK, Let’s fast forward. Yes, I got the darn things. A few complications ( I should have known then right), but I kept them with no problems or so I thought until the summer of 2016. By then they were 13 years old. One morning I was in the shower and noticed an extreme difference between the left and right breast. What you ask? Well, the left one was pretty much as flat as a pancake.
I immediately called my doctor and scheduled an appointment. Headed to Miami the next week and yes, he confirmed that my left implant had ruptured. For those of you wondering, I had a saline 350cc implant. Basically, I was a 36 D. You can imagine when the left one wasn’t filled, it was pretty noticeable.
Now, in general during those 13 years, I have always had to watch what I ate. I definitely didn’t have a fast metabolism. In fact in 2013, I did the Ideal Protein program and lost 30 pounds easily and got back down to my cozy spot of around 167 pounds but in 2016 after that rupture everything changed.
After the Rupture
In July of 2016, I had surgery to have the implants fixed. I had never even considered having them removed and not put back in. This time, I had a Mentor implant put back in, did another lift and had them put under the muscle. The surgery was extremely more painful this time, mainly because we were cutting the muscle and inserting the implant under neath. Recovery was long. I was in pain for probably about 2 weeks. At first, everything looked amazing to me. In fact, I was more happy with them than the first set.
It was about a month later that I started noticing a pocket of fat under my arm pit. I kept commenting on it but I just figured things had to settle. Then in September and August, I noticed that I was gaining unexplained weight and fast.
I decided to do all the things that I did when I lost weight in 2013. I started Ideal Protein again. I had very limited carbs. I went back on hormone replacement, I walked, I ran, I biked. I drank shakes. I ate all vegetables. I cut out foods. I just kept gaining weight.
Then I noticed other strange things. The brain fog was crazy. I couldn’t think. I would sit in front of my computer and not have a clue what I was suppose to be working on. Dry skin. Depression. Nerve Pain. Hair falling out. Difficulty concentrating. Headaches. Vision issues. Mood swings.
What in heck was I doing wrong? You better believe that I have thrown myself into every health book out there. I have worked with holistic practitioners, integrative medicine doctors, and even spiritual advisors.
When It Hit Me
In August of 2018, my beloved cousin passed away from Bile Duct Cancer. I had never even heard of that before. She was training for marathons, had a great life. Then had a random check, was diagnosed in November and then just gone 7 months later. One afternoon, we were standing with her mother and we asked, “What do you think caused this?” Her reply was immediate. She said, “I think it was her breast implants.” I have to say, I stood there kind of shocked like REALLY? I kind of blew it off until I got back to Florida and then…
One night I was laying in bed and turned to Google of course. I was trying to find a connection of any kind between Bile Duct cancer and breast implants. Although there wasn’t a direct article, there were thousands and I mean thousands of articles, testimonials and groups of women reporting 40-50 unexplained symptoms. I couldn’t believe what I was reading and then all the sudden it hit me. I started connecting the dots between when my surgery was and when all of these unexplained symptoms started attacking me.
Not one doctor will tell me that my implants are what is causing these issues. Most doctors will tell you that implants are completely safe, especially saline, however what they don’t tell you is that the bag that holds the saline is made of silicone and the toxins can still affect your body. What they don’t tell you is that when you have an implant that ruptures, mold and bacteria can enter your blood stream. What they don’t tell you is that all the heavy metals in these products have been known to have a direct link to all the symptoms I am experiencing. WHAT?
I have made the decision to have my implants removed. It’s emotional. It’s difficult. I am scared. It’s hard to talk about but like anything I have gone thru, I know that the only option is to educate other women so that they know the risks or they get answers to what might be going on with them. I have had doctors and practioners look at me like I am crazy. People that know me well have even kind of stare at me with a side eye. But when after two years, no one can give me answers. When they tell me everything is normal, no matter how many times I say I don’t feel normal, well it’s time to ignore the chatter and take things into my own hands.
The amount of women explanting now has gone up considerably and as you can imagine, so has the cost. To have to wait, when I know all that I know at this point is excruciating. You feel like you just have this alien living inside of you making you more and more sick.
Because I have time before explanting. I decided to do as much research as I can. Explanting might not be the holy grail to feeling my best, so that means, I need to make sure my habits and mind are right before surgery. This means morning routines, eating habits, mindset, workouts and whatever else that I need to do to make sure that I am ready for the emotions of all of this.
This summer, I stumbled upon the books by the MEDICAL MEDIUM Everything that that author, Anthony Willliams speaks about FINALLY made sense. I turned my attention to CELERY JUICE and all of the loads of information inside these books.
All of the books are an incredible read and let me first also say, I am not making money to sponsor these books but I have connected with the protocol in so many ways. After dealing with so many doctors, it just feels like Anthony is the only one keeping it real and I am now at the point where I have found resources to start healing while I wait.
This book isn’t like any other health book that you have read, I can promise you that. In fact, it actually goes against the grain. Kind of like me in many ways right? I have been looking for answers to my health issues for 2 years. It wasn’t just about losing weight. It was about figuring out what was going on and gaining control of my body again.
After reading this book, I had the answers to what was going on with me and the solutions to help my body heal. Pretty powerful stuff!
WHAT I AM SUFFERING FROM….
After doing a ton of research, reading this book, and visiting qualified holistic doctors, I’ve come to the conclusion that I am suffering from the following:
- I have Epstein-Barr Virus (EBV), a toxic overload of heavy metals
- I am also suffering from adrenal fatigue, thyroid issues, and have a sluggish or fatty liver.
- I suffer from gall bladder issues, brain fog, candida, anxiety, depression, panic attacks and severe heart burn
This might seem scary to many, it is super scary for me too. There is something so terrifying about not having any control over your body and so,
It was time to start cleansing the toxins out of my body. Next week, I plan to start the 28 day raw fruit and vegetable cleanse. I might not be able to stop all of the toxins with the implant still inside my body but at least I can not help the toxins by feeding on foods that just make them more happy.
WHAT I AM CUTTING OUT
Giving up meat, cheese, eggs, corn, nuts, caffeine, alcohol, and dairy for an entire month was nothing that I would have ever considered doing! Sure I already stay away from wheat, gluten and eat minimal grains, but I love my cheese and meat and I really love eggs and coffee.
I mean in my world, my thought process is that we need protein right? Fat and carbs? Every meal right? I mean this is what balances our blood sugar.
I could actually live on eggs. According to Anthony, eggs feed the viruses and meat will definitely make your live more sluggish. So because nothing else has worked, I plan to eliminate them for 28 days. I am in no way becoming a vegan or vegetarian but I need to cut foods out in order to figure out what is actually affecting me.
It’s time to give something a chance that goes against everything I believe. It’s time to learn about my body myself with out listening to everyone else.
WHAT I PLAN TO EAT ON THE CLEANSE
The Medical Medium is how I was led to celery juice. I have been drinking celery juice since before Christmas and this week every morning on an empty stomach. I can’t say for sure the long term affects but I do know how I feel when I don’t have it.
- Upon Waking – I drink 16 ounces glass of lemon water. This helps detox the liver.
- Pre-Breakfast – 16 oz pure celery juice (freshly juiced, I have this juicer).
- Breakfast Smoothie- 2 bananas, 2 cups wild blueberries, 1 tsp Hawaiian Spirulina (this stuff is incredible for your health), 1 tsp barley juice powder (Want energy? Barley juice powder gives you tons of natural energy and helps detox heavy metals too).
- Mid-Morning – fruit (apple, orange, pear or melon), celery sticks,
- Lunch Smoothie – 1/2 bunch fresh cilantro, 2 handfuls of spinach, few leaves of kale, 1 tsp Hawaiian Spirulina, 1 large orange, 1-2 apples, 1-2 cups mixed fruit
- Afternoon tea – I choose from one of 3 different herbal teas that specifically help with my symptoms. Lemon Balm, Dandelion Root, or Nettle leaf,
- Mid-Afternoon – Mangoes, Berries or more fruit if still hungry (I eat until I am full)
- Dinner – Mixed green salad with shaved carrots, cucumbers and tomatoes and a huge pile of homemade guacamole.
- Evening Tea – I choose from one of 3 different herbal teas that specifically help with my symptoms. (See above)
- PM Snack – banana, apple or pear (I eat as much as I want until I am full)
I’ll be honest, fruit scares me. I don’t know where we have been taught that fruit is bad, but the truth is fruit is hard to digest when you have a high fat diet. And let’s just say, I’ve tried everything else and feel horrible, so what do I have to lose.
The BENEFITS OF CELERY JUICE
It has been said that celery juice has a ton of benefits. Here are the 12 reasons listed on the Medical Medium website. Now I will say, I am no doctor and please before you try anything new, consult your doctor but as I said above, I definitely notice a different in how I feel and my digestion.
WHY I SHARING?
I vowed when I started my businesses to share what I learn. To inspire women to always feel like they have the power to change their circumstances. Health and wellness have everything to do with how successful you are. It may not have anything to do with cozy spaces, or home fragrance or social media (the main focuses of this website), but it does have everything to do with being a BOSS.
You have the power to ask questions and take your power back. It’s scary to stand up for yourself and maybe to be vocal about something not everyone agrees with. It’s scary to go in a different direction but you CAN do it.
Ask yourself, Do you want to be the best you? Do you want to look back and have regrets? Do you want to feel your best, look your best, do your best? Well you can! If my store of questioning doctors, doing my own research and changing my habits helps just one of you……well than writing this blog post was worth every minute.
SYMPTOMS & SIDE EFFECTS OF MY 28 DAY RAW CLEANSE
Follow my journey on Instagram and stay tuned for my cleanse results, my next step, my surgery and so much more. And more than anything, thank you for all your support in this not so easy topic to talk about. Some have views. Some have opinions but in the end…….. I have one life and I plan to do everything I can to make it the best.